In Response to Zach

Here is what I wrote to Zach, because after reading his story 3 times I thought I was going to explode with frustration...

"Dear Zach,
We recently read your article (posted in April) about how bicyclists need to get off the road and onto the sidewalks and the nicest way we can say it, we are disgusted by you and every moron who shares your close minded and ridiculous thoughts.
Here in L.A. where we are based out of, it is actually more unsafe for bicyclists to be on the sidewalk to keep pedestrians safe and give them the room they need. Have you ever walked down the sidewalk in L.A.? Well I'm sure that we would run you over if you were. As well I would like to draw your attention to the thousands of dollars spend by many cities that have actually paid for the signage "Share the Road" but, you would have to stop changing the song on your ipod, or stop texting to actually see that, and God forbid you do something logical!
Riding a bicycle is healthy, eco friendly (but what do you care since you won't be alive to see the real effects of it and I highly doubt that any female would ever mate with such an ignorant fool), and is also a great way to meet people. If people like you would get on a bike, which I'm sure you never have, you would understand how fun riding your bike can be as well you could actually see your surroundings instead of just zooming past them because you haven't figured out how to work your alarm clock. I also would like to point out that no person in this organization coasts and we are all very aware of what is going on in the roads that we ride in. Perhaps you should actually do what you are supposed to do on the road, and DRIVE, and then you would see us cyclists.
I also wanted to add that in your article there are several spelling and grammatical errors that were quite disconcerting, you should perhaps hire an editor. Your metaphors, which probably seemed very intelligent to you, really came off like those of a high school journalism student with Autism.
I hope that you never hit anyone, or in fact when you do, I am so glad that I have saved your article so that it can be used against you in court so you can never ever get your license back. Do take care, and no need to write us back, we wouldn't want you wasting your precious time (since you seem to be the only one in the world... how pretentious) on some stupid cyclists.
Cheers,
Bike Day LA (and I'm sure we share the sentiments of most other cyclists in the world)"